INTO THE TEENS

Well in theory my mom was sending to the best school in our area she wanted me to have a good education and like a lot of mothers before her she didn't want me to end up like her, i  was to attend a girls grammar school i started when it was on the cusp of going from grammar to comprehensive and the result off that was like i realised on the first day of school i was way out of my comfort zone . My mom got a school grant for my uniform so off we trudged to the local shop that took school grants i was kitted out in what i needed but it was the bare minimum with no extras the first day of i went with my new uniform and  school bag with a hint of optimism in the start of my new life after sitting in the classroom for most of the day i came home with a sense of dread you see most the children there came from middle class two parent families dad had a job some of them Even mom worked they had cars and nice houses one or two of them even had there own horse break time they had money for the tuck shop while i of course had none but the most humiliating time came when it was lunchtime i was given free school dinners but the policy at my school was that all those who paid for school dinners ate first all those who had free school dinners had to wait till the end so of course that made you stand out from the rest straight away and almost on the first day i was known as the poor kid and most of the other children looked down  there nose at me. As the first few weeks unfolded it was plain how much i stood out the other girls had cookery baskets for home economics ballet shoes for ballet money for breaks extra activities etc. i had none of these and mom just didn't have the money so of course it was not long before i started to be bullied even the teachers look down at me that would be unheard off these days some of them even made it plain that they thought i was not worth there time i was a bright child but after not to long i decided even at that young age i was better off not bothering .Time passed and i became more withdrawn and isolated and at night in the quiet of my own room i would cry and my spirit protectors would talk to me i would ask them how long would this go on and why were the other children so cruel and they would answer me back and tell me that all these experiences would help me to learn and become part of my life lessons and i would have many more to go through but in the end it would be worth it because it would help my spiritual self grow and my mortal self learn and that it turn would form me into the person i would become ...............god bless

THE LAST OF THE EARLY YEARS (PROMISE)

Well i returned to school in the September of that year after missing  almost a year and things settled back down well that was until the November of that year when my elder brother caught whooping cough and yes i am sure my mom went into shock as well it spread through the house like wildfly and soon all three of us had  it my poor mom must have been at the end of her tether but again she got on with it and nursed us all how she coped i will never know it must have been so hard for her having no one to turn to no husband to tell her it would be alright to give her a cuddle or just to help out she was a strong lady she never thought she was she spent all her life thinking she was weak but she had a strength like no other i have probably only realised this as i have grown older and had children of my own if this had been me i am sure i would have cracked under the strain After three more months we were all fit and well again and life settled down i was still struggling at school partly because i had been away for so long that i found it hard to fit back in and partly because i still felt different to all the others i spent a lot of time alone and only found comfort in my spirit friends and every now and then my lovely grandad would pop in and say hello i told my mom once and she told me not to be silly it was just a dream so i decided there and then it was best to keep it to my self around this time my elder brother woke one night and come running out of his bedroom saying he had woke up and seen a young boy standing there it scared the life out of him i didn't quite understand this as i saw them all the time and to be truthful i quite liked them and never felt scared i presumed the young boy had wandered into my brothers room instead of mine.I think it was around this time my mom began to realise that i was a bit different to other children we had our own house phone fitted it was very exciting i would be sitting there with my mom and i would say mom phones going to ring the next second the phone would ring or i would say mom so and so is coming to visit us tonight my mom would say no they are Janice no ones coming tonight but sure enough that night the door would knock and the person i said was coming would be standing there one day my mom asked me how i knew all these things that were going to happen all i could say was that they would tell me my friends she never asked who my friends were but she did look at me funny from time to time .The end of my infant and junior school days were coming to an end and i was looking forward to starting a new school making new friends and perhaps being normal for once my mom god bless her wanted the best for me and decided to send me to the posh girls school next to the comp about 10 minutes walk away from where we lived  this was going to bring a whole new chapter of my life and a whole lot more problems ...........godbless .

EARLY YEARS (CONTINUED

So here we are again and i will now go back to where i left off in my last post ,Christmas came and even though money was very tight my mom did her best to make it a special one now i look back we didn't have a lot but those Christmas were some of the happiest that i remember January started with a harsh snow and our house didn't have central heating and even if he did i doubt we could have afforded to put it on one night whilst i was sleeping in my moms bed i started to feel very unwell a high fever coughing and pain all down the left side of my chest even when my mom tried to hug me and comfort me the pain was to bad even for a cuddle the next morning me my mom and baby sister sat in the doctors surgery to see the doctor i liked DR farnon he made me laugh his was an Irish man really chubby with a big red face and laughing eyes a good soul , as soon as my mom took me in to see him he know i was ill very ill he did all the checks a Doctor does and at the end he told my mom i had pleurisy and pneumonia and i was very sick ,when i got older my mom shared with me what was said that day he said i needed to be in hospital but also he knew the situation my mom was in a single mother with a young baby and a son who was at school no money with me being in hospital my mom would not cope with two small children at home no one close to help even if she could come to the hospital to see me she would not have been able to afford the bus fares there ,and there i would be in hospital very ill alone scared and grieving for my family DR Farnon decided this would do no one any good and to be truthful he didn' know if i was going to even pull through so they decided i would stop at home and he would treat me .The next thing i remember was DR Farnon wrapping his big wool coat around me picking me up and striding out the door with my mom following he announced to a packed waiting room that he was very sorry but this was a emergency and he would be back when he could he then went through the door and bungled me into his car my mom sitting next to me i remember she was crying; he pulled up outside our house which was only about a five minute walk from his surgery he brought Me in the house and carried me upstairs and placed me in moms bed he said "now maureen keep her warm give her fluid if she will take it i will be back as soon as surgery is finished with her medication until she turn the corner i will come in first thing in the morning before surgery again at lunch time and again last thing at night" he looked at me and said"don't worry darling we will get you well .  He was true to his word he was back that lunch time with my medication ,two hot water bottles and an old electric fire . I spent a long time in my moms bedroom most of it sleeping waking to see the doctor at my bed and my mom looking pale and every now and then i would see a man in blue  robes stroking my head and telling me to rest close my eyes and he would lead to the most beautiful place where i could play and run and sit on the lovely old bench by the water  i knew this was one of my special friends (spirit) and in later years i realised this was the first time i was introduced to my special place . I was ill for sick months missed school (though there was the odd visit from a teacher with a book once i had progressed to lying on the settee with a blanket ) how my mother coped with a sick child and two small children and little money i will never know but she did god bless her and DR Farnon well he kept to his word three times a day until i was better he nursed me back to health and i am sure that if it had not been for that wonderful doctor and my blue robed visitor i would not be here now and in later years i realised that the wonderful doctor had been my first earth angel ..................godbless

EARLY YEARS (PART TWO)

So carrying on from my last post the early years that was my first if unknown experience with spirit i was born into a normal family and for those days we were classed as the horrible term lower class we lived in a two up two down little terraced house with a back yard  and an entry at the end of the entry was the washroom where you did your washing complete with a mangle (for those who are not familiar with the term mangle it was a device that sort of roller ed your washing to get the water out )next to the washroom were the toilets two to be exact and these served about 10 terraced houses all with family's in.I lived in our little house with my mom ,dad and of course my elder brother and the odd mouse ,when i was three we moved to a bigger home with three bedrooms all mod cons and a garden on a brand new council estate my mom was over the moon Things had started to go wrong even then in my young life (somethings are best left unsaid but needless to say the things that happened were not nice) and this started to effect me but i was still seeing my spirit friends and found comfort in them but by the time i went to infant school i began even at that early age to realise not everyone could see and hear spirit so of course i was confused and in turn became scared  so in my little mind the best thing i could do was completely start to ignore them after a year at infant school my little life took another knock my parents separated being so young i didn't know why or understand a few months earlier i had had a new baby sister and things seemed good now my mom cried all the time my dad was not around and i felt so lonely/ i always knew  i was different from other children my age so this made me very shy and nervous of other children when my parents separated this made me become more withdrawn and i felt very isolated .After about twelve months of my dad leaving another blow came we lost our Nanny to bowel cancer something else that became a trauma in my life but i will save that for another day anyhow back to what i was saying so we lost nanny who was a lady who gave me good advice and little pearls of wisdom even at that early age like "you have the gift and never be afraid of what you see and hear" these things never meant anything to me at the time and only came to light many years later, a year later we lost our grandad to the same disease my mom was traumatised with so much sadness and with a young baby didn't really have much time or energy for me so i became more withdrawn, it was around this time i had my next encounter with the spirit world which became a trend in my life where they would save me look after me and protect me . I was about six or seven years old my mom told me the story she said she would put us all to bed tidy up then sit down to watch some telly she said she would be sitting in the lounge when she would hear a thud she would get up to see what it was open the door and there i would be standing fast asleep but sleep walking she would take me into the lounge and lay me down on the settee where i would wake up on my own then she would pop into bed she said this carried on for a few nights she would hear footsteps from my bedroom to the stairs and then a thud she would open the door and i would be standing there asleep and she could not understand how i got down the stairs so quick so after experiencing this for a few nights she decided she would sit at the bottom of the stairs and see what was happening sure enough about 9.30pm she heard my footsteps and me get out of bed she sat there watching she said i stood at the top of the stairs then she said within a split second i jumped and her heart she swears stopped she said there was no way a small child could clear all those stairs but she said it was almost like someone was there with me picked me up in there arms and carried me down the stairs and placed me upright in a perfect standing position at the bottom she said it was like i had floated down the stairs and she knew that as i jumped someone had been there with me caught me and placed me safely at the bottom after that my mom wouldn't put me to bed she would keep me up with her let me fall asleep on the sofa and carry me to her bed when she went then sleep with her arm around me so she would sense if i moved she was always scared that i might sleepwalk jump from the top of the stairs and one day my angel might not be there to catch me .................more to follow ....... godbless `

THE EARLY YEARS

hi everyone i am often asked the question when did i know i had the gift that always makes me chuckle because as much as it is a gift this is how it has been for me since i was a small child and i always thought i was strange and believe me back then did;t see it as a gift . My earliest memory of my strangeness as i used to call it is at around nine months yes you heard right nine months i have been blessed with a memory that i cant explain i remember most things from when i was a young baby which my parents have verified i digress sorry i was sitting in my pram the old fashioned type a blue silver cross pram with the big wheels my mom used to put it up against the living room wall and sit me there so she could carry on in the kitchen but could keep an eye on me (the layout of the house to long to go into) anyway my two year old brother was playing with his balloon a orange balloon i was sitting in my pram watching him when he got the balloon trapped between the wall and the wheel of the pram he then grabbed hold of the pram and tried to pull it away from the wall so he could get his balloon just a few seconds before it tipped up i felt someone grab me i watched as the pram tipped up my brother fell and landed on the rug whoever picked me sat me down next to him the the pram crashed to the ground my mom come running in and stood there stunned my brother was crying  and i was just say there years later i told my mom what i rememered and she stood there shocked i was nine months old it was a blue pram my brother did have an orange balloon but my mom had never know what had made the pram tip over and how i ended up sitting on the rug i happily filled her in on what my brother had done and how someone or something had picked me up and put me on the rug next to him she had never known what had happened and my brother was to young to tell her but she never sat me in the pram again and was pleased to know that it was my brother who had tipped it and my guardian had saved me from a nasty bang .As i grew  older i knew i was different if you like i seem to see people when other people didn't when i was a tot that was fine they were friends and i was happy to sit play and chat with them as i grew older i began to realise not everyone saw them so started to keep quite and many times would run and hide behind the settee as i didn't want to see them this was not the only thing different about me i also had what i call a sixth sense i knew when things was going to happen when the door would knock the phone would ring and when some event was going to happen i also learnt that my friends were there to look after advise me and protect me they would also let me know when someone was not genuine a lot of people have said to me that must have been wonderful but as a child i became isolated and lonely i became with drawn as i knew that not everyone appeared as they seemed . Just a little snippet of my early years more will follow ...........godbless

TURNING NEGATIVE TO POSITIVE

 Hello everyone hope all are well i have had a funny couple of weeks here now i don't know if its anything to do with the hot weather that we are having here at the moment but i have been feeling uneasy and very down this in turn affects my spiritual state of mind when i am feeling down it sometimes means that i have been surrounding myself with people who have negativity in there life or who just have negative vibes now that i am writing this down i can see why i have been down because i have been talking to a few people who have negativity in there lives and one person in particular who has a very negative attitude, Now how do we deal with this well the easy way is to cut these negative people out of your lives but as we all know we do not live in a prefect world and sometimes this is just not possible so how do we stop other peoples negativity affecting us again never easy but the first thing we need to do is to try and fill our lives with positivity and light try and stop that negativity impacting us what a lot of people don't realise is when negative energy gets into our thought its spirals into our lives and every corner of our world negative energy breeds with every negative thought we have so it goes something like this we listen to people and all there problems we listen to there negative thoughts and there negative attitudes so what happens all of a sudden we start to feel down we think about what has gone on what they have said we feel low and before you know it you are feeling down when we are down we only see the bad things of our selves we look in the mirror and don't like what we see we think we are to fat to thin to grey to ugly that dress/top jumper skirt looks horrible we become irritable then star snapping we take it out on our loved ones and in the end they snap back that makes us feel worse about us and our loved ones also start to feel down and it all starts again or another example we come across somebody who is angry they do something to offend us or upset us and we get angry and in turn we do something to upset or offend someone else and so on and so on see how negativity breeds and grows from one person  to another  so what do we do, do we stop listening to people who have problems do we avoid everyone with a negative attitude to we lock ourselves away and never venture into the world in fear that we might be affected by negativity no of course not because we would become scared of negativity never go out be sociable or helpful or caring so again negative wins so what do we do we have to learn to change our way of thinking and acting so when we do come face to face with negativity learn to recognise it when you have spent that time in someones company and they have a lot of negativity take time out afterwards sit and relax then look for anything positive think of all the positive things in your life no matter how small think of all the things we take for granted no matter how small it could be the food we have just eaten or the smile from a child or the laughter you here in the street or the sun that is shining or the grass that is so green the memories from your child hood that day you first met your child all happy positive thoughts no matter how small then if you can when you are with these negative people every time you look at them see them with a lovely bright light around them if you come across someone who is angry don't let them make you the same but hope that they can let go of there anger and become better for it this world is not a perfect world and never will be but if we can make positive moves in our own lives it will contribute to the bigger picture if we can try and stop negativity getting to us then it has less chance of breeding onto the next person its never easy to do and still catches me out at times but there is an old saying practise makes perfect .........godbless

WHAT WILL BE WILL BE

 Hi everyone well i am feeling a bit low at the moment i don't think there is any reason in particular for it maybe i am feeling a little dismayed i do like to care my hubby says i am a carer of life and now i find that my brood have all grown up and are doing there own things and to be honest i am a bit lost even though i love to see my family all doing there own things its true when people say you end up feeling a bit unwanted but as always i am trying not to let these negative thoughts impair on my life and i am trying to keep things more positive but like all of us i do find this hard at time so i have been doing some meditations today also i have been grounding . Things that get me down are the way people act sometimes like today for example i had 3 readings booked not one texted me to say they wanted to cancel there is no excuse they had my number so a simple text would have done the trick i know we are having gorgeous weather but people really do not understand what goes into doing readings they think they just turn up and i just sit down and whoosh there i am talking to spirit  its just not that simple i have to prepare for readings first i like to ground and protect myself then i like to cleanse the area i am doing readings in then i like to meditate all this has to be done before hand so people not letting me know they are not coming to me is rude i do have a life and i can be getting on with other things but now i will stop moaning and on the positive side when i was supposed to be doing reading i was in fact sitting in the garden spending rare time with my son and soaking up the beautiful sunshine so all was not lost and like i always say what will be will be those three people were obviously not meant to have communication with spirit today ,,,,,,, godbless

WHEN WE ARE TESTED WHAT DO WE DO ?

I  know i will be talking tonight to a lot of you that have felt this way at some point in our life what do we do when our earth plane life test us how do we cope? well i can only speak for myself and believe me i have bee tested many many times and how i handle it is now so different to how i used to now is that because i have grown older and wiser or is it because i now know there is a bigger picture to it all when i was younger i had a lot of personal conflict going on with myself as i have probably spoke about  before but as i come to terms with who i was i found that when the testing times came i could deal with them better how i hear you ask well first of all i look at the bigger picture i.e am i supposed to learn from this what am i supposed to be learning can i learn i believe we all have many many life lessons they will sometimes make us and sometimes they will break us for awhile  but what i do know is no matter what we are going through our spirits guides and higher beings will always try to help and protect us the secret is to tune into them and acknowledge they are there don't get me wrong our spiritual helpers are not there to solve every life problem we have because we are here to have these life lessons to learn from them and to grow but they will try to guide us and to comfort us when we need them, there has been many times when i have been pondering a problem worried confused and upset when we get like this trying to solve something can be hard our emotions can be all over the place so the first thing we need to do is to ground ourselves there are many ways of doing this but i find when we are all over the place doing something that takes a lot of effort just doesn't work for us  so here's a really simple way to calm and ground ourselves kick of your shoes and go for a walk on the ground outside walk found the garden just as simple as that you will be surprised how calming this can be just say please help to guide me onto the right path they will be there they will be listening and they will try to help ......godbless xx

WHEN WE ARE LED

 Hello everyone i hope i find you all well i have not been here much i know but that does not mean my spiritual journey has not been carrying on i have been getting more and more busy with my private readings and last night i had what i call a heavy duty night of readings the night before i had had a terrible night i had a lot of pain and hardly any sleep so on getting up yesterday morning i was not feeling my usual chirpy self  all day i thought about cancelling my night of readings for two reasons the first being i was really tired and in pain the second was it was a distance away and i would have to travel but each time i thought about it i just couldn't cancel so in the end off i set when i got there i was greeted into the house to do five readings i knew it would be a long night and in truth i was not looking forward to it but the people could not be nicer and made me feel very welcome so i set up and was ready to start the first lady came in to the room where i had set up to work as soon as she sat down my heart sank i could feel she was very guarded and what i thought was hard shelled to be able to communicate with spirit not only to they build on my energy but also the person they wish to communicate with if they have shut off or have a shield around them it is hard for spirit to do this so i must admit i sat there with a bit of a heavy hard and thought to myself this is going to be a hard night but the one thing i did know was that as soon as the lady walked in so did a spirit gentleman and he told me not to be to down hearted she was not as hard as she looked she was suffering and she was a good soul  so i started the reading confident he was going to help me i started to talk and this man was giving me quite good validation but it was not enough for this lady i could tell she wasn't convinced i was talking to him so i was asking my spirit gentleman if he would please give me some validation that would convince her he was there and sure enough he came through and gave probably one of the most best validations i have ever had as soon as i said what he had told me i saw the lady crumble and her eyes soften she knew i was talking to her man and he was there to help her i continued with the reading after i finished she left the room a whole  lighter than when she entered i then carried on with the rest of my readings and ended up having a very good night at the end of the night i was talking with the first ladies son over a cup of tea in the kitchen while i was waiting for my lift back home he said he could not thank me enough for what i had done for his mom and then he told me the story the lady had lost her husband her life partner six months before they had a very good marriage and were really close after his passing the lady couldn't cope and had sunk into a bad depression even thinking suicide the family had tried everything to help her even grief counselling but nothing had helped so that's when they had decided to call me in they had heard about me through a friend the son said to me today i was going to call your number and speak to you he said please don't take offence to this but i was going to say to you i don't care if you are real or fake but i will give you some information and tonight will you tell it to the first lady you see she needs help and we are desperate but then he said but every time i went to pick up the phone i couldn't do it i said to him i am so glad you never because firstly if you had asked me to do that i know i would have never agreed to it and secondly it most probably would have stopped me coming here tonight as i was talking to them his phone rang and after the call his wife said that was our son her grandson he was talking her home he said to his mom mom its fantastic i have my nan back we will never be able to thank you enough to say i was touched was an understatement but i cant take all the credit spirit had been there with me helping me to help him talk to his wife i know she had found peace and that is leaves me with a feeling i will never be able to explain but i know with all the events of the day and previous night i was meant to be there that night i needed to see that lady and to help and my angels guides and spirits had led me there so again i thank them for working with me for giving me the opportunity to help someone and letting me have this wonderful gift ..............godbless