INTO THE TEENS

Well in theory my mom was sending to the best school in our area she wanted me to have a good education and like a lot of mothers before her she didn't want me to end up like her, i  was to attend a girls grammar school i started when it was on the cusp of going from grammar to comprehensive and the result off that was like i realised on the first day of school i was way out of my comfort zone . My mom got a school grant for my uniform so off we trudged to the local shop that took school grants i was kitted out in what i needed but it was the bare minimum with no extras the first day of i went with my new uniform and  school bag with a hint of optimism in the start of my new life after sitting in the classroom for most of the day i came home with a sense of dread you see most the children there came from middle class two parent families dad had a job some of them Even mom worked they had cars and nice houses one or two of them even had there own horse break time they had money for the tuck shop while i of course had none but the most humiliating time came when it was lunchtime i was given free school dinners but the policy at my school was that all those who paid for school dinners ate first all those who had free school dinners had to wait till the end so of course that made you stand out from the rest straight away and almost on the first day i was known as the poor kid and most of the other children looked down  there nose at me. As the first few weeks unfolded it was plain how much i stood out the other girls had cookery baskets for home economics ballet shoes for ballet money for breaks extra activities etc. i had none of these and mom just didn't have the money so of course it was not long before i started to be bullied even the teachers look down at me that would be unheard off these days some of them even made it plain that they thought i was not worth there time i was a bright child but after not to long i decided even at that young age i was better off not bothering .Time passed and i became more withdrawn and isolated and at night in the quiet of my own room i would cry and my spirit protectors would talk to me i would ask them how long would this go on and why were the other children so cruel and they would answer me back and tell me that all these experiences would help me to learn and become part of my life lessons and i would have many more to go through but in the end it would be worth it because it would help my spiritual self grow and my mortal self learn and that it turn would form me into the person i would become ...............god bless